Each Loss Breaks a Pattern, a prayer for a shiva by Trisha Arlin
This prayer was written to introduce the service at a shiva minyan.
![]() Resources shared under CC BY-SA — 🖖︎ Prayers & PraxesEach Loss Breaks a Pattern, a prayer for a shiva by Trisha ArlinThis prayer was written to introduce the service at a shiva minyan. Intention for community garlic planting at the end of a harvest season, by Jess BerlinGarlic is typically the last crop planted on a farm, it is planted in the fall and harvested the following summer. So you are leaving a legacy for next years farmers (which might be you). We begin by separating the garlic bulbs from the cloves, similar to separating people from their community. Then, once the individual (garlic cloves) are planted, they form new communities in the ground. Similar to the process that we are all going through. Leaving our community here on the farm and going out into the world to create new communities. שבע ברכות לנפשות קשורות | Seven Blessings For Interlinking Souls, by Rabbi Dr. Raysh Weiss and Rabbi Jonah RankWhen Jonah Rank and Raysh Weiss intended to finalize the words of the “Seven Blessings” (Sheva Berakhot, שֶֽׁבַע בְּרָכוֹת) that their friends and family members would offer them on their big day, they attempted to preserve the most widespread Ashkenazic version of these seven nuptial blessings with which their Jewish marital status would be effected. However, they attempted to avoid phrases that would limit the gender or sex of the blessings’ referents. Additionally, they sought to ensure that their blessings focused on the happiness of the occasion at hand. Yizkor: Instructions for Remembering, by Rabbi Nina MizrahiA paraliturgical yizkor prayer. In the Sukkah At Least, It’s a Wonderful World — a song for Sukkot by Len Fellman“In the Sukkah At Least, It’s a Wonderful World” by Len Fellman was written for Sukkot in 2015. A Prayer for Justice, Blessing, and Praise on Shabbat Shoftim, by Virginia Spatz (2015)“Does joy come in the morning, where weeping has not tarried for the night? Can we dance together, if we have not yet joined in lament?” This prayer is a kavanah for the morning blessings, using language and images from the prayer “Mah Tovu” [how lovely are your tents] commonly recited in the early morning blessings. Offered with special intention for the healing of Congress Heights, Capitol View, and other neighborhoods in Washington, DC, rocked by persistent violence. Kavvanah before the reading of parashat Aḥarei Mōt and the pain caused by Leviticus 18:22, by Rabbi Victor Reinstein (2015)“A kavvanah (declaration of intention) that we bring to the reading of parashat Aḥarei Mot and the pain caused by Leviticus 18:22” was offered by Rabbi Victor Reinstein in 2015. Activist Prayer for a Trauma Center on Chicago’s South Side, by Aryeh Bernstein (2015)A disproportionate amount of the alarming gun violence in Chicago takes place on the South Side, yet the South Side lacks even a single level one adult trauma center. Consequently, gunshot victims sometimes minutes from death must be transported miles away to Downtown or North Side hospitals. In 2010, after Damien Turner, an 18-year-old resident of the South Side Woodlawn neighborhood, died waiting for an ambulance to drive him ten miles to a downtown hospital instead of two blocks to the University of Chicago Medical Center (UCMC), a grassroots collaboration of community organizations, faith leaders, and University of Chicago student groups began organizing the Trauma Center Coalition, dedicated to reopening a Level 1 adult trauma center at UCMC, the most well-resourced hospital on the South Side. So far, the university has refused. As part of the coalition’s ongoing campaign, last week [April 23, 2015], dozens of activists gathered on the university’s historic Midway field, for a vigil of prayer and song from different faith traditions. At dusk, participants lit candles to spell out “Trauma Center Now”, right across from the home of U. Chicago President Robert Zimmer, and then camped out for the night. As a representative of coalition partner Jewish Council on Urban Affairs, I was invited to offer a Jewish prayer, which is reproduced here; I read it in both the English and Hebrew. מִדְבָּר קװעסט | Midbar Quest, a tabletop fantasy adventury roleplaying activity by Aharon VaradyA tabletop fantasy adventure roleplaying activity intended for learners to develop fluency in the landscape and lore of Jewish storytelling. Preparing for the Shema, a responsive reading by Rabbi Cantor Eva Robbins (2015)Originally composed by Rabbi/Cantor Eva Robbins for her ordination at the Academy for Jewish Religion, California, in 2015, this responsive reading is intended to prepare oneself for a deeper connection before chanting the Shema. It can be used alone or in community. תפילה לזכר הנערים | Prayer in the memory of Eyal Yifrach, Gilad Shaer, and Naftali Fraenkel — by Rabbi Tamar Elad-Appelbaum (Masorti Movement in Israel, 4 July 2014)This prayer in lament for three Jewish youths taken captive and killed by Hamas in 2014, was written by Rabbi Tamar Elad-Appelbaum and published by the Masorti Movement in Israel through their Facebook page on 4 July 2014. English translation by Shoshana Michael Zucker. הארבה כוסות ואת הארבה חופשות | The Four Cups of Wine and the Four Freedoms, by Dr. Aurora Mendelsohn and President Franklin R. RooseveltTraditionally each cup in the Passover Seder is liked to a promise made by God in these verses, Exodus 6:6-7. The four cups can also be associated with the Four Freedoms first articulated by US President Franklin D. Roosevelt on January 6, 1941, which were an inspiration for the Universal Declaration of Human Rights and were explicitly incorporated into its preamble. Zekher Milah, a different tack on Brit milah & Brit banot by Rabbi Arthur WaskowFor a number of reasons, some medical, some psychological, some spiritual, some communal-traditional, I support and urge male circumcision. When couples have come to me and despite my advice are adamant in refusing to do it with a boy-child, AND/OR if they ask my advice about a brit/ covenant ceremony for a girl — I urge them to follow what I’ve proposed below. תְּפִלָּה יְהוּדִית לְיוֹם הַנַּכְּבָּה | A Jewish Prayer for Nakba Day (يوم النكبة), by Sarah M.A Jewish prayer for Nakba Day, as commemorated on May 15th in the civil calendar of the Dawlat Filasṭīn. תפילה לתורם דם | The Blood Donor’s Prayer, by Elli FischerA prayer to be recited upon donating blood. In Israel, there are major blood drives around the times of Rosh Hashana and Pesaḥ, so the prayer borrows themes from both of those holidays. It emphasizes both the tzedaka aspect of blood donation and the ancient symbolic resonances of blood sacrifice. הָרַחֲמָן עַל שְׁנַת הַשְׁמִיטָה | A Haraḥaman for the Shmitah Year in the Birkat haMazon, by Rabbi David Seidenberg (neohasid·org)This Haraḥaman (prayer to the merciful or compassionate One) for the Shmitah or sabbatical year can be added to Birkat Hamazon (blessing after meals) during the whole Shmitah year, in order to remember and open our hearts to the sanctity of the land. Say it right before the Haraḥaman for Shabbat, since Shmitah is the grand shabbat, and right after the paragraph beginning with Bamarom (a/k/a, Mimarom). הַוִּדּוּי הַמַּשְׁלִים | HaVidui haMashlim (Complementary Confession), by Rabbi Binyamin HoltzmanA complementary (positive vidui) to supplement the harsh communal and personal vidu’im (confessions) being offered during the Zman Teshuvah. תפילה לראש חודש טבת ותקופת החורף על חנוכּה | Prayer for the new moon of Ṭevet on Ḥanukkah occurring on the winter solstice, by Rabbi David Seidenberg (neohasid·org)A brief liturgy for the occurrence of the winter solstice [in the Northern Hemisphere] with Ḥanukkah. Note that this is a kind of eco-liturgy, but it also stands on its own without imposing an ecological overlay. Since it’s still solstice all day, you may want to use this prayer now, or at dusk tonight. تعالوا نضيئ شمعات السلام | בואו נאיר נרות שלום | Let us Light Candles for Peace, by Sheikha Ibtisam Maḥameed and Rabbi Tamar Elad-AppelbaumTwo mothers, one plea: תחנון לימים קשים | Taḥanun [Plea for Mercy] on Hard Days by Noa Mazor (trans. by Jonah Rank)A teḥinah (supplication) for divine help after terrible violence that interferes with the recognition of each person being made in the likeness of the divine image. Meditation on the Aqedah, by Shim’on MenachemI had an opening, with the help and support of some holy chevrei, to take on Binding of Isaac and accompanying meditations that occupy a conspicuous space during the morning blessings. This is what came out. עלינו | An Alternative Opening for Aleinu, by Leon GuntherLeon Gunther presents a proposal for a revision of the controversial line of the traditional Aleinu prayer, shehem mishtaḥavim l’hevel varik (“For they worship ephemera and emptiness, and pray to a god who cannot save,” a combination of Isaiah 30:7 and Isaiah 45:20). שמחת בת | Simḥat Bat by Yoni and Hannah Kapnik AsharThis is a simḥat bat baby-naming and welcoming ceremony, based on similar ceremonies by Dr. Devora Steinmetz and Rabbi David Silber, Rabbi Elie Kaunfer and Lisa Exler, Drs. David and Joanna Arch-Andorsky, and others. תפילה למעמד המשותף | أغنية الحياة والسلام | Prayer of Mothers for Life and Peace, by Sheikha Ibtisam Maḥameed & Rabbi Tamar Elad-AppelbaumA prayer in Hebrew and Arabic (with translations in English and German) of solidarity of mothers for there to be peace in the world for the sake of their children. אֵל מָלֵא רַחֲמִים | El Malé Raḥamim – Interfaith Memorial Service for the Homeless, by Rabbi Victor Reinstein (2014)This paraliturgical adaptation of the El Malei prayer for an Interfaith Memorial Service for the Homeless was offered by Rabbi Victor Reinstein in 2014. תפילה לשלום ופיוס לישראלים ולפלסטינים ולכל העם | A Prayer for Peace and Reconciliation for Israelis, Palestinians, and all People by Rabbi Samuel Feinsmith (2014)Master of compassion and forgiveness, Cosmic Majesty Who is peace— Yet Again: A Prayer for Israel and Gaza, by Rabbi Victor Reinstein (2014)A desperate prayer against the dehumanization and reductive feelings of anger and desperation in the context of the conflict between Israel and Gaza in the summer of 2014. ברכה לשלום החיילים | Prayer for the Well-being of IDF Soldiers, by Yaacov Maoz (2014)A prayer for the well-being of IDF Soldiers written during the 2014 Israel-Gaza Conflict. Prayer for the Abducted Nigerian Schoolgirls, by Rabbi Hillel Lavery-Yisraëli (2014)God of all people’s souls: Hasten, we pray, to rescue the hundreds of Nigerian young girls, innocent students who, in horrific cruelty, were abducted from their houses and schools by inhumane criminals intending to sell them into slavery and torture them. A Lamentation for Gaza on Tishah b’Av, by Rabbi Brant Rosen (2014)A Tishah b’Av seliḥah for Gaza during the 2014 Gaza War. תפילת לשלום החיילים | Prayer on Behalf of the Jewish Soldier Going into Battle by Rabbi Dr. Nathan Lopes Cardozo (2014)Bring our soldiers home from the battlefields, alive and unharmed Let the blessing which You gave to Avraham come true A Prayer for Compassion During Violent Conflict, by Trisha Arlin (2014)A prayer for empathy and compassion in the face of calls for violence and vengeance. תְּפִלָּה לְהַצָּלָה מִפִּגּוּעֵי טֶרוֹר | Prayer for Rescue from Terror Attacks | Bön om skydd från terrorhot, by R’ Hillel Ḥayyim Lavery-Yisraëli (2014)Let us not fear or be afraid, for you are our protector. “…Jacob shall return and live in peace and security; no one will terrify him again.” Guard our going out and our coming in, from now until eternity, and let us say, Amen. כַּוָּנָה לִפְנֵי וִדּוּי | A meditation prior to the confessional, by Reena Kling (Havurat Shalom 2014/2022)This kavvanah preceding the great vidui, appears in מַחְזוֹר בִּרְכַּת שָׁלוֹם Maḥzor Birkat Shalom, an egalitarian Rosh haShanah & Yom Kippur maḥzor (Havurat Shalom 2014/2022). The kavvanah was composed by Reena Kling ז״ל, and translated into Hebrew by Emily Aviva Kapor, with editing by Aliza Arzt. מִי שֶׁבֵּרַךְ לְפִדְיוֹן שְׁבוּיִם | Mi sheBerakh for the redemption of those in captivity (or whose whereabouts are unknown)This mi sheberakh was published by the Office of the Chief Rabbi of the United Hebrew Congregations of Great Britain and the Commonwealth in June 2014, as “Prayer Issued for Missing Israeli Teenagers,” writing: “The prayer…currently being recited across Israel for missing teenagers Naftali Frenkel, Gilad Shaar and Eyal Yifrach, was issued today to Rabbanim of the United Hebrew Congregations by Chief Rabbi Mirvis.” Recitation of this psalm and mi sheberakh seem appropriate to me in the case of unconscionable, immoral, and unjust state policies that separate children from their caregivers. To help fulfill the mitsvah of ransoming captives, please contribute to funds paying out bail bonds and demonstrate your opposition to these policies. ט״וּ בִּשְׁבָט | Rebirthing the Tree(s) of Life: Four Teachings for the Four Worlds of Tu BiShvat/Yah BiShvat by Arthur WaskowThe four teachings above are connected with the Four Worlds that the kabbalists saw as the architecture of the universe. When the Kabbalistic community of Tz’fat created the Seder for Tu BiShvat/ Yah BiShvat, they unfolded these Four Worlds in four cups of wine and four sorts of fruit and nuts (one sort so ethereal it was invisible and untouchable). This year, the full moon of Shvat will fall on Shabbat Shira itself, January 24-25. תפילה לבוחר טרם הבחירות | A Prayer for Voters Before the Israeli Election, by Rabbi Esteban GottfriedA prayer for voting on election day in the State of Israel. מי שברך לתלמידים היוצאים לחופשת הקיץ | A Mi sheBerakh prayer for students leaving school for their summer break, by Rabbi Esteban GottfriedA mi sheberakh prayer by Rabbi Esteban Gottfried for the parents of students leaving school for their summer break. Prayer for the Interment of Sacred Writing in a Genizah, by Morah Yehudis FishmanMy bones whisper that your pages and your inks will return to the trees and the plants from where they once came. They say that someday they will even come back to life with words never yet heard. If I Let It: A Kavvanah for Kabbalat Shabbat, by Trisha ArlinShabbat happens, Rosh Ḥodesh Shevat, a prayer-poem by Trisha ArlinThis is the month when we tell the story סֵדֶר סְפִירַת הָעֹמֶר | Seder Sefirat ha-Omer :: the Order of Counting the Omer between Pesaḥ and ShavuotEach day between the beginning of Passover and Shavuot gets counted, 49 days in all, 7 weeks of seven days. That makes the omer period a miniature version of the Shmitah and Yovel (Jubilee) cycle of 7 cycles of seven years. Just as that cycle is one of resetting society’s clock to align ourselves with freedom and with the needs of the land, this cycle too is a chance to align ourselves with the rhythms of spring and the spiritual freedom represented by the Torah. Prayer on Beginning a New Journal, by Aharon N. VaradyMay my thoughts seek truth and integrity, the humility that is commensurate with my ignorance, the compassion that arises from the depths of awareness, as depths speak to depths… עַל הַנִּסִּים בִּימֵי הוֹדָיָה לְאֻמִּיִּים | Al haNissim prayer on Civic Days of Patriotic Gratitude, by Aharon VaradyOpportunities to express gratitude on civic days of patriotic thanksgiving demand acknowledgement of an almost unfathomably deep history of trauma — not only the suffering and striving of my immigrant ancestors, but the sacrifice of all those who endured suffering dealt by their struggle to survive, and often failure to survive, the oppressions dealt by colonization, conquest, hegemony, natural disaster. Only the Earth (from which we, earthlings were born, Bnei Adam from Adamah) has witnessed the constancy of the violent deprivations we inflict upon each other. The privilege I’ve inherited from these sacrifices has come at a cost, and it must be honestly acknowledged, especially on civic days of thanksgiving, independence, and freedom. I insert this prayer after Al Hanissim in the Amidah and in the Birkat Hamazon on national days of independence and thanksgiving. The Council of All Beings, an activity for all ages on the Jewish New Year’s Day for Animals, Rosh haShanah la-Behemah, on Rosh Ḥodesh ElulDomesticated animals (behemot) are distinguished from ḥayot, wild animals in having been bred to rely upon human beings for their welfare. As the livelihood and continued existence of wild animals increasingly depends on the energy, food, and land use decisions of human beings, the responsibility for their care is coming into the purview of our religious responsibilities as Jews under the mitsvah of tsa’ar baalei ḥayyim — mindfullness of the suffering of all living creatures in our decisions and behavior. Rosh haShanah la-Behemah is the festival where we are reminded of this important mitsvah at the onset of the month in which we imagine ourselves to be the flock of a god upon whose welfare we rely. The “Council of All Beings” is an activity that can help us understand and reflect upon the needs of the flock of creatures that already rely upon us for their welfare. תפילה (ישראלית) לפני הכניסה לקלפי (למאמין וללא מאמין) | Prayer before entering the voting booth in Israel (for believers and non-believers)May it be the will [before the Lord our God and the God of our ancestors] that this ticket which I am placing in my ballot will join thousands of other tickets that will promise reasoned leadership that will strengthen democratic values, aspire towards peace with our neighbors, separate religion and state, be concerned with the weak and protect the laborers, fight corruption and exercise leadership through personal role modeling. May it be the will [before the Lord our God and the God of our ancestors] that the nation sitting in Zion will merit years of freedom, quiet, productivity, education and good health and that our children may never fear at all. כָׇּל־חֲמִירָא | Kavvanah for Returning Our Ḥamets to the Earth by Rabbi David Seidenberg (neohasid·org)Some people think of this as a magic formula that turns ḥamets into dust. It really is a legal formula that means that you renounce ownership of any ḥamets still in your space or your domain, so that it no longer has any value to you. But is it true that dirt is valueless and ownerless? We certainly act like we own the dirt, the soil. Developers take good land, build houses on it, and truck the topsoil away to sell to other people—thereby doubling profits and doubling damage to the earth. We act like the soil can be renewed and replaced at will, poisoning its microbial communities with pesticides applied even more strongly on our GMO corn and soy, while we replace the nutrients they create with petroleum-based fertilizers. We send the soil downstream and into the ocean along with vast quantities of agricultural runoff, creating algal blooms and anoxic dead zones. In that sense we do treat the soil like it is both ownerless and valueless. But our lives are almost entirely beholden to the soil. If it is ownerless it is because it belongs to all of us, or more precisely, as the story of the rabbi deciding between claimants goes, “The land says it doesn’t belong to you or to you, but that you belong to it.” Like the dirt of the earth, the ḥamets inside your house becomes what at Burning Man we call “MOOP” (Matter Out Of Place). Finding out where it belongs means finding out that it doesn’t belong to you or to us. Returning it to the soil means tilling our stuff back into the earth, where it can become renewed, where it can become sustenance for new life. מִי שֶׁבֵּרַךְ | Mi sheBerakh for United States Military War Veterans, by Hinda Tzivia EisenA “mi sheberakh” prayer for U.S. war veterans on the shabbat preceding Veterans Day (November 11). עלינו | An Alternative Opening for Aleinu, by Rabbi David Seidenberg (neohasid·org)This version of the Aleinu recognizes that all nations play a role in God’s plan for humanity. תפילה ליום הודו על חנוכּה | Prayer for when Thanksgiving Day falls during Ḥanukkah, by Rabbi David Seidenberg (neohasid·org)A prayer for “Thanksgivukkah,” on the rare year that the two festivals intersect. |